Thanksgiving Again,
Just Don't Stuff It
By Dorsetta Hale
Thanksgiving used to be a favorite holiday
of mine, second only to Christmas. But in the last couple of years
things have changed. I have absolutely no control and I don’t
like it one bit. It all started going downhill when I was scheduled
to work one particular Thanksgiving at my job as a 911 Dispatcher.
After shopping, chopping, dicing and decorating, I carefully laid out
instructions for my family to help out in preparation for a dinner
feast hosted at our house with the relatives. Everything was going
well. In between real emergencies from the public, I handled emergency
calls from my kids, such as “Mom, is the gravy supposed to have
dumplings in it?”
Then I received the one call every emergency worker dreads. Someone
from the next shift called in sick and I was on top of the mandatory
overtime list. I couldn’t believe that someone would love their
family so much as to call in sick on a holiday and forfeit a payday
worth double time and a half.
Had I not been a professional, I would have been distraught. Instead
I continued to do my job, but without the smile in my voice that
I am known for. I literally almost forgot to pick up my daughter
from the airport who was arriving from Southern California, during
my lunch break. At that point, a coworker who didn’t have any
guests coming in, volunteered to work my mandatory shift. I was able
to go home at my regularly scheduled time after all and have the
Thanksgiving I’d planned for.
The next year I got wise and started bidding for a work schedule that
would include holidays off, eliminating any chance that I’d
have to work. So, my days off during the fall and winter became Wednesday/Thursdays.
I had no social life outside of the office, but by gosh, I got to
spend Thanksgiving and Christmas with the people I truly loved.
I began to question my decision when a daughter showed up one year
with a boyfriend and proceeded to act out a “PG-13” rated
display of affection at the dinner table. A blessing should never
begin with “Dear Lord, please get them a room."
Last year my in-laws hosted Thanksgiving at their house and my children
got to meet their father’s high school sweetheart. I bonded
with my nieces and nephews at the kid’s table while my husband;
I’m sure, boasted about how happily married he was. As much
as I tried, I couldn’t overhear anything. Anyway, I managed
to take the evening in stride without one sip of alcohol, which unfortunately
is why I still remember it.
This year’s Thanksgiving was great. I had the day off without
having to fake my own death. Everyone’s old flames celebrated
elsewhere and all was right with the world, except that while I was
cooking the turkey, its juices dripped and made the oven smoke. My
Beta fish nearly died of suffocation from the fumes. I changed half
the water in the aquarium and held my breath for twelve hours as he
swam to the surface gasping for air or oxygen or whatever it is a fish
needs. In the morning, when I came downstairs for breakfast and turned
on the light, he was in the corner of the tank, looking still and lifeless.
I tapped on the glass and he perked up, swimming and showing off his
beautiful ocean blue fins. I was so thankful he was alive that I actually
shouted in what I can only describe as glee. And as is custom in most
families, when mom is happy, the family shall rejoice.
Thanksgiving has changed and I don’t understand why because in
my family it was a holiday that was all about tradition. There was
no guesswork. Thanksgiving Day was not unpredictable. The weather was
always cold, not a balmy 76 degrees and breezy like it is now. The
wind has been so strong that one of my daughters on her way home from
school, found our trashcan down the hill in front of someone else’s
house. She carried it back up as though it was as precious as our mailbox.
On the Thanksgiving holidays of my youth, Mom cooked and Dad carved
the turkey. We sat down to eat with people we knew were going to
be there. There were no surprises. Nothing bad ever happened. It
was perfect. I don’t remember the grownups changing. I don’t
remember the exact moment things changed and I grew up. As much as
I am in the moment of my children’s lives, I will never know
exactly when they grew up and began changing again. At this rate
anything can happen, as it surely will. When it does, I only hope
I’ll have the strength of my Beta fish, to take deep breaths
and go with the flow.
Copyright 2005, Dorsetta Hale
Back to Columns |